Furthermore, this certain somebody - who once lived across the street from Stewart Junior High School - is under the illusion that, should he be able to play an entire season in 2014, Joltin' Joe would not benefit from better nutrition, better training, better scouting, improved travel & housing accommodations, many fewer day games, more comfortable uniforms, better equipment and vastly greater financial incentives whereas this same somebody - who shares initials with a famous Soviet model of automatic rifle - believes with the same ardent, fervent belief as only those who are faith-believers in man-made global warming can, that Jay Bruuuuce would outperform even Babe Ruth were Bruuuuce to be transported back to 1927, and that Bruuuce would somehow not wilt under the hardships of all day games, heavy wool uniforms, greasy spoon nutrition, primitive training, medieval medical care, minimal scouting, non-air-conditioned travel by train, non-air-conditioned hotel & housing accommodations, spit balls, bean balls, no batter's eye backdop, having to work in the off-season as a lumberjack..... over the course of a Roaring Twenties baseball season. It's this kind of crazy thinking that might someday lead to a crypto-communist community organizer being elected to the Presidency of the United States!
The subject of this paragraph alerted the Heavy Artillery editorial board of our error. The bloke who shares his initials with a famous Soviet model of automatic rifle, in fact, stated it was his belief that Zack Cozart would outperform Babe Ruth should Cozy - and not Jay Bruuuuce - be transported back in time to 1927.
Heavy Artillery regrets the error and is happy to correct the record as it only casts AK's dubious assertion into an even more mirthfully doubtful realm.
As a way of making amends, Heavy Artillery offers Kuertz three chords and the truth.
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